Weapons List

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By Paul (vhayste)

Last Updated: Mar 18th, 2014

There are a total of 103 weapons, costume sets and equipment in the game. If you're playing for the console version, getting all of these will unlock the Full Arsenal trophy/achievement. Getting all the costumes will also unlock the Clothes Whore trophy/achievement. There are a lot of missable equipment and weapons especially during quests so make sure to loot every single container, item bag or knocked out enemies you encounter. Check every nook and cranny of the areas that can be interacted with as well.

The following items are listed alphabetically.

Weapon	How to Acquire
Alien Probe	Loot it from the chest along the way to the second elevator in the quest“Alien Abduction”
Alien Ray Gun	In “Alien Abduction”, loot this from one of the defeated aliens
Archmage's Wand	Shop in Vancouver, Canada
Axe of Stopping	Kupa Keep Armory
Axe of the Underworld	In a locked chest in the ceiling of Jimbo's Guns. You can get the key after completing his sidequest.
Bar Darts	Complete the sidequest “Rats in the Cellar”
Bastketball	In the cafeteria during the main quest “Attack the School”. Loot the body of the kid beside the door marked “In” to get this item.
Batdadarang	Mackey's table inside the Community Center
Battle Bow	Elvenwares shop in the Elven Kingdom
Billy Club of Smiting	Defeat the guard in Dark Meadows Estates during the quest ”Gate Crashers”
Broken Bottle	Loot from one of the hobos holding Cornwalis captive in the sidequest “Dropping the Kids Off”
Canadian Halberd	Shop in Ottawa, Canada
Chakram	Sparkle Chamber shop
Chef's Skewer	In the cafeteria during the main quest “Attack the School”. Head to the right of the food counter to find this.
Claymore of the Warrior	Shop in Ottawa, Canada
Club of Smiting	Kupa Keep Armory
Crossbow of Impalement	Jimbo's Guns
Crutch of Weakness	Defeat Jimmy in the quest “The Bard” then loot his body.
Dire Scepter	Shop in Banff, Canada. Becomes available after defeating the Bishop.
Discus of Bleeding	Cathedral in Banff, Canada. You need to destroy the vase on the room to the left and step on the pressure plate to unlock the room containing this chest.
Dodgeball	Defeat the enemies holding the brass key in “Detention Sentence” then loot their bodies.
Elf Blade	Elvenwares shop in the Elven Kingdom
Elvish Longbow	Elvenwares shop in the Elven Kingdom
Elvish Shortbow	Obtained after defeating the three elves guarding the exit in the Giggling Donkey basement.
Fairy Princess Blade	Sparkle Chamber shop
Fairy Princess Bow	Sparkle Chamber shop
Fatbeard's Blade	Kupa Keep Armory
Fire Sword	Kupa Keep Armory
Flamberge Rapier	Shop in Winnipeg, Canada
Gnome Pickaxe	After killing the three rats in the third area, you'll find this inside the item bag to the right. (Quest: Defeat the Underpants Gnome)
Grenade of Slowing	In a locked chest in the ceiling of Jimbo's Guns. You can get the key after completing his sidequest.
Holy Hammer of Smiting	Defeat the first nazi zombie gingers during the main quest “Attack the School”.
Holy Mossad Knife	Shop in Banff, Canada
Jewish Staff	Kupa Keep Armory
Kenny's Bloody Club	In a chest on the roof of his house's garage
Knead Ring, The Dough Hammer	Sparkle Chamber shop
Kris Dagger	Kupa Keep Armory
Lawn Dart	In a chest in the Dark Castle's first floor.
Lightning Wand	Kupa Keep Armory
Longbow	Elvenwares shop in the Elven Kingdom
Mace of Restoration	Loot Hallway Monitor Boss' body in “Detention Sentence” to get the key. Loot his body then open the locker to the lower left, in the first hallway to get the Mace of Restoration.
Magic Staff	Kupa Keep Armory
ManBearPig Claw	Defeat Al Gore disguised as ManBearPig in the sidequest “Defeat ManBearPig”
Master Razor	Found in the item bag in the same spot where the nazi zombie gnomes are hanging around under the floor during the quest “Unplanned Parenthood”
Missile of Slowing	Kevin Stoley, reward for completing the sidequest “Vulcan Around”
Mongorian Bow	Defeat the mongolian kids on the second floor of the Tower of Peace and loot their bodies.
Noob Hammer	Kupa Keep Armory
Poison Grenades	Inside the drawer beside the Operating Room A in the abortion clinic. You can access it during the quest “Unplanned Parenthood”.
Raider's Blade	Elvenwares shop in the Elven Kingdom
Rod of Major Boobage	Mackey's table inside the Community Center
Rod of Waste	In a chest beside the valve which will lower the sewer sludge level.
Rogue's Dagger	Kupa Keep Armory
Serrated Axe of Rending	Chest, northwest corner of the Duke's palace. Destroy the wall to access it.
Sickle Sword of the Faithful	Kupa Keep Armory
Slashing Blade of the Ranger	Defeat Stan during the main quest “Attack the School”
Staff of Winter	Kupa Keep Armory
Star Wand	Chest inside the 4th Grade room.
Stone Hammer	In a chest on the roof of the military headquarters on the crash site.
Super Bouncy Ball	Shortly after entering the mouse hole, go around the mousetrap to the left the climb the stapled wires on the wall to reach the item bag containing this item. (Quest: Defeat the Underpants Gnome)
Super Cereal ManBearPig Club	Defeat Al Gore in “Unfriend Al Gore” to get his Secret Room Key. Enter the room then loot the chest inside.
Sweet Katana	Jimbo's Guns
Sword of Endings	Elvenwares shop in the Elven Kingdom
Vibroblade	After reaching the smartphone where Big Gay Al rings, kill the bacteria and loot this from it.
Warrior Blade	Kupa Keep Armory
Warrior Longsword	Jimbo's Guns
Warrior's Scimitar	Kupa Keep Armory
Wooden Crossbow	Jimbo's Guns