Men are From Freeport, Women are from Qeynos

"Why would I give you 3 plat? Why would you even ask me for 3 plat?" I quickly type.

"Oh good, you are back. I thought maybe you got disconnected. Why would I ask?" he asks, having caught up with my typing. "But, you're a girl! You are a girl, right? Not some sick guy who gets his jollies pretending to be a girl?"

Whaaaat?! (The lump prods me with an un-aimed hand and says "Shhhh!")

"My sisters always help me, my mom always helps me, they are girls. Girls help you when you need help, it's like they have to, it's a law or something. I would ask my sisters but they don't play this game, and my mom thinks I play it too much so I can't ask her."

"Wait, does your mom play EQ2?" I ask.

"That's all you got from what I just said?" he slowly replies.

"Does she?" I repeat.

"Well, yeah," he finally admits.

"And you can't ask her to buy you a horse?"

"Not right now, she's sleeping. And if I did ask her she would make me do something for the money like paint the garage or change the oil on the car. I don't want to ask her. So what do you say, can I have the plat?"

I briefly considered killing him and leaving, but this is not a PvP server, so the game won't let me.

"OK I'll give you three platinum pieces," I nod.

"Oh awesome!" he cries, and then initiates a trade.

"But in return I need you to go harvest some resources for me," I add.

"Uh. Okay, what?"

"I need 5 Rough Pearl, 5 Nimbus Root, and 5 Spongy Loam. You get that for me I will give you the three platinum."

"Are you insane? That's like, that's. A single Rough Pearl sells for 3 plat! If I got that stuff I wouldn't NEED your money!"

"True," I nodded.

"Do you make your boyfriend pay for it? I bet you do."

"Rough Pearl? Damn skippy I do, that stuff is not cheap."

"You suck!" he cries, and then runs away.

Well that ended badly, but at least he didn't ask me to cyber I tell myself.

Girl Gamers

Gaming openly as a girl is a choice that comes with consequences, this is something that I have learned over the course of more than 5 years of playing EQ2, and over ten years of gaming in total. During that decade I have been hit on a lot, and if I had a platinum piece for every time I was asked if I looked like my avatar in real life (I do) I would be one wealthy gamer, but no matter how often I have an encounter like this one I am still left in stunned disbelief by it.

A lot of guys think that girls game to meet guys. That is not really true, we game for the most part because we enjoy gaming. I have heard the argument made that girls expect and receive special treatment from the guys that they game with simply because they are girls. I honestly do not believe that this is true and it is certainly not true in my case, but if it happens it is not the girl gamers fault, it is the guy gamers for being such a doofus.

It is not uncommon for girl gamers who only play web games and an MMO to not be considered "real" gamers, which I admit I don't get. I own a very powerful and modern PC upon which I game as well as do other PC things upon, I own an Xbox 360 and a PlayStation 3, and yes, a Wii. I hardly ever use my Wii, which is too bad, but honestly the best games come out for either PC, the 360, or PS3, and in my mind the Wii is really only there for the Wii exclusive games, and that is how it should be.

Don't be that guy...

This is a comic from Dueling Analogs by Steve Napierski , a modern day games philosopher who not only draws awesome comics but has a keen eye for observing the absurdity of the differences between girl gamers and how they are perceived by guy gamers and the companies who make video games. Check it out!

I am just as likely to play a shooter as I am an action-adventure or RPG title, and I really liked the BioShock and Fallout series. I do not game as much as some and I know I game more than others, but if I am asked I do consider myself to be first a gamer, and second, a girl gamer.

You cannot play games openly as a girl and not expect that a certain percentage of the male population is going to be silly around you. It is almost like real life but not really; save for one event that took place at a wedding reception (and he was really drunk) I have never had a man ask me to show him my tits in real life, but it has happened in games. More than twice.

Are you a guy gamer? Do you want to meet the love of your life in an MMO? Want some advice little brother? To start with, 'wanna cyber?' is not the best way to introduce yourself to a girl online. As odd as this sounds, treating them the way you would in real life (assuming you would not walk up to a girl you do not know and ask if she wants to have sex with you) is a much more effective tactic.

Statistically if you draw a girl gamer into conversation in a game during the 'getting to know you' stage of a relationship, eventually she is going to feel comfortable enough with you to bitch about what is bothering her in-game. It might be a named monster battle, or a particularly difficult quest, some other guy who is pestering her, or a special piece of armor or weapon she is having problems getting. Here is the thing, and the mistake that most guys make: she is not asking you to solve that problem for her, she is just venting. She doesn't want you to go out and fix this, she just wants you to listen while she tells you about it, because for girls talking about problems makes us feel better about them.

As smart as we are, you would be surprised how shocked we are when you go out and FIX the thing we were just complaining to you about. That was not the point, we were sharing, we were venting, we were talking, that was all we were doing. If we wanted you to get that piece of armor or punish that guy who was pestering us... Wait for it... Wait for it... We would have said so.

Before you start to think that I am harshing on you, I am not! I am not being mean, I am just trying to explain to you how we see the world, and how you do. I really think that venting is why guys think that girl gamers want guys to go get them things and do things for them. Well, now you know! So next time you meet a girl in game and she tells you about the jerk that asked her to show her tits, just nod and say "That sucks, what a turd!"

She will be happy, you will have scored a brownie-point, and you can now go do something together!