How do you join friends games online?
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I'm pretty sure you have to have their Brawl Code, and they have to have yours.
From the main menu you select Nintendo Wi-Fi Connection, then you go to the icon on the left with a heart that says "with friends" then you go to the icon on the top left that says "Brawl." There you're going to see a list of the friends you have on Brawl, and if someone's status says "awaiting brawl" click their name and press "Join Group"
For more questions for Super Smash Bros. Brawl check out the question page where you can search or ask your own question.