This is the Portal FAQ v1.0
By Mark Green
Email address for submissions/comments:
mark [at] antelope [dot] nildram [dot] co [dot] uk
The latest version of this FAQ will always be available from
http://www.gamefaqs.com.
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Neither the author of this FAQ, nor any person who distributes it in
any way, shall be responsible or liable for anything that results from
using this FAQ for any purpose, including but not limited to damage to
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This FAQ may be freely distributed provided that it is kept unmodified
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Portal is (c) Valve Software. The use of any trademarks within
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INTRODUCTION ---------------------------------------------------------
Portal is a Half-Life 2 engine game designed as a showcase for an
innovative game mechanic: the portal gun. Portal is available at
retail as part of the "Orange Box" compilation, or it can also be
bought on its own from Steam for US$19.99.
Portal is actually an updated version of an older game called
"Narbacular Drop", which is available for free. Narbacular Drop has
far fewer levels, and much worse graphics, and some exploits that
work in Narbacular Drop don't work in portal.
======================================================================
GAME MECHANICS =======================================================
======================================================================
PORTALS. If you don't get these, you're going to be in trouble.
There are two, the blue portal and the yellow portal. Go through the
blue portal and you come out of the yellow portal, and vice versa.
If only one of the portals is active, it'll be all cloudy indicating
that it can't be used because it has no other end. The two portals
exist in exactly the same map - there's no "multi-dimensional" thing
going on. There are all kinds of funky things to learn about portals,
but you'll learn most of them by playing the game, so I won't explain
them here.
METAL. Walls and floors can be made out of it. If they are, you
can't put portals on them. Bummer.
BUTTONS. All buttons are red. Some buttons are small, and you can
press them yourself with the USE key, whereupon they'll activate
something. Usually, the button will reset after a while and the
thing it activated will shut down. Other button are large, and you
can activate them by standing on them, but usually this will be no
use because you will need to be somewhere else to interact with the
thing the button's connected to. The solution is to pick up a..
CUBE. Handy little things which you drop on big buttons to hold them
down. You can use them for other purposes too. Cubes can be
destroyed. If a cube is destroyed, you'll usually be given another
one at the point where you collected the cube from originally.
EMITTERS, PELLETS, RECIEVERS. Emitters occasionally shoot energy
pellets. If an energy pellet hits a reciever, it activates something
(permanently). If an energy pellet hits you, you die. If an energy
pellet hits anything else (such as a wall, or a cube) it bounces off,
and will continue bouncing for a finite time before it explodes. The
emitters are very waste-conscious; they will not shoot another energy
pellet while one is already in the air (but if there are two emitters,
each one can have a pellet in the air) and they will stop shooting
altogether when all tasks requiring energy on a map have been
completed.
KILLER FLOOR. Also known as goo. It's on the floor. It kills you.
Any questions?
TURRETS. Ok, I'll be a bit less facetious about these guys, since
they're quite interesting. Essentially, they sit there looking in
one direction (you can see their red scan beam emitted in that
direction, but their field of vision is actually about a 45 degree
cone with the beam in the centre). If they see you, they activate
and start shooting you with their machine guns. Glass, walls, or
cubes will block the guns (glass will be cracked, but won't break).
They continue firing until you're dead or you move out of the way.
Damage in Portal is a bit odd - essentially, if you get shot too much
you're dead, but there is no LASTING damage. You can get shot a
little bit by every turret on a map and you'll live, but if one of
them shoots you too much, you'll die. Assuming you move out of the
way, they'll search for you for a moment, then shut back down again.
And they have cool sing-song computer voices and they're
magnificiently creepy. How do you defeat them? It's actually easy.
You just push them over (!) from the side. You can also drop them
into portals if you like - anything that makes them fall over. The
only kicker is that when they are shooting you, their shots knock you
back, so you can't simply approach them and tip them from the front.
But since you have portals, approaching them from another direction
can't be too difficult, can it? By the way, turrets are smart and
recognise other turrets, so they won't start shooting when they see
one. But you CAN make them shoot at another turret by dodging out
of the way carefully, and you CAN make them fall on each other.
ROCKET TURRETS. Not the same as the regular turrets. These guys
move through a full 360 degree fire arc, but they move really
slowly. If they see you, they'll pause for a good second before
firing a rocket at you. In that second, you want to get out of the
way. Seriously. One rocket hit equals death. Rocket turrets cannot
be defeated or destroyed - even if you trick them into shooting
themselves, even a rocket hit does not kill them. They can, however,
be mercilessly exploited, as we shall see.
======================================================================
MAIN GAME WALKTHROUGH ================================================
======================================================================
The walkthrough is broken down with the following section headers,
which you can search for (turn on case sensitivity):
PRELUDE
TEST 1
TEST 2
TEST 3
TEST 4
TEST 5
TEST 6
TEST 7
TEST 8
TEST 9
TEST 10
TEST 11
TEST 12
TEST 13
TEST 14
TEST 15
TEST 16
TEST 17
TEST 18
TEST 19
THE CAKE
GLADOS
PRELUDE --------------------------------------------------------------
"Hello and again welcome to the Aparture Science Computer Aided
Enrichment Centre. We hope your brief detention in the relaxation
vault has been a pleasant one. Your specimen has been processed and
we are now ready to begin the test proper. Before we start, however,
keep in mind that although fun and learning are the primary goals of
all Enrichment Centre activities, serious injuries may occur. For
your own safety and the safety of others, please refrain from
*static*.. and back. The portal will open in 3, 2, 1.."
[Note: the music you hear on the radio here is actually the ending
song, in a different form.]
1. Walk through the yellow portal and around the cell into the next
room.
2. Pick up the cube and drop it on the button.
"Excellent. Please proceed into the chamber lock after completing
each test. First, however, note the incandescent particle field
across the exit. This Apature Science Material Emancipation grid
will vapourise any unauthorised equipment that passes through it; for
instance, the Apature Science Weighted Storage Cube."
3. Walk through and get in the lift.
TEST 1 ---------------------------------------------------------------
"Please place the Weighted Storage Cube on the 15 hundred megawatt
Aperture Science Heavy Duty Supercolliding Superbutton."
1. Fall down from the entrance platform and turn 180 degrees to find
the yellow portal. Wait for the yellow portal to change to the cube
chamber. Go through the yellow portal and pick up the cube, then
return through the blue portal (if it has disappeared, wait for it to
reapper).
2. Wait for the yellow portal to change to the button chamber, then
go through the yellow portal and drop the cube on the button.
"Perfect. Please move quickly to the chamber lock as the effects of
prolonged exposure to the button are not part of this test."
3. Return through the blue portal, then wait for the yellow portal
to change to the exit gate. Walk through and get in the lift.
TEST 2 ---------------------------------------------------------------
"You're doing very well. Please be advised that a noticable taste of
blood is not part of any test protocol, but it is an unintended side
effect of the Aperture Science Bacterial Emancipation Grid, which may,
in semi-rare cases, emancipate dental fillings, crowns, enamel, and
teeth."
1. Pass through the door and down the stairs, then wait for the blue
portal (it may take a while). Pass through it and fall down, then
get the portal gun.
"Very good. You are now in possession of the Aperture Science
Handheld Portal Device. With it, you can create your own portals.
These intradimensional gates have proven to be completely safe. The
Device, however, has not. Do not touch the operational end of the
device. Do not look directly at the operational end of the device.
Do not submerge the device in liquid, even partially. Most
importantly, under no circumstances should *static*."
2. Place the blue portal on any wall and walk through it to the exit
door, then pass through and get in the lift.
TEST 3 ---------------------------------------------------------------
"Please proceed to the chamber lock. Mind the gap."
* Shoot any portal onto the wall behind the security camera, while
the other portal is open, to destroy the camera. You can destroy any
camera in the game this way. You don't ever have to do this, but
destroying them all gets you the Camera Shy achievement. From now on
I will only mention the locations of security cameras.
1. Shoot a blue portal onto any wall and pass through it to cross the
first gap.
2. Shoot a blue portal onto the wall across the second gap, then pass
through the yellow portal to cross the second gap. Get in the lift.
"Well done. Remember, the Aperture Science Bring your Daughter To
Work Day is the perfect time to have her tested."
TEST 4 ---------------------------------------------------------------
"Welcome to Test Chamber 4. You're doing quite well."
* Security Camera. "To ensure the safe performance of all authorised
activities, do not destroy vital testing apparatus."
1. Shoot a blue portal onto the floor underneath the cube dropper
(you can wait for a cube to fall first if you like and then aim under
it).
2. Collect the cube from the yellow portal and drop it on the button.
"Once again, excellent work. As part of our required test protocol,
we will not monitor the next test chamber. You will be entirely on
your own. Good luck."
* Security camera. "For your own safety, do not destroy vital testing
apparatus."
3. Get in the lift.
TEST 5 ---------------------------------------------------------------
1. Go to the pit at the back of the room and shoot a blue portal
under the cube.
2. Shoot the blue portal onto any wall and pass through. Get the
cube and drop it onto one of the buttons.
3. Pass through the blue portal again onto the upper platform.
* Security camera on the wall to your right. "Certain objects may be
vital to your success. Do not destroy testing apparatus."
4. Shoot the blue portal onto the wall behind the opposite platform,
then pass through the yellow portal. Get the cube and drop it onto
the other button. Go through the opened gate.
"As part of a required test protocol, our previous statement
suggesting that we would not monitor this chamber was an outright
fabrication. Good job. As part of a required test protocol, we will
stop enhancing the truth in 3... 2... *static*"
5. Shoot the blue portal onto any wall. Pass through and get in the
lift.
TEST 6 ---------------------------------------------------------------
"While safety is one of many Enrichment Centre goals, the Aperture
Science High Energy Pellet seen to the left of the chamber can, and
has, caused permanent disabilities, such as vaporisation. Please be
careful."
1. Shoot the blue portal onto the ceiling above the receptor. (Note
the yellow beam indicating a straight line to the receptor.)
"Unbelievable. You, subject name here, must be the pride of subject
hometown here."
2. Go up on the elevator platform and get in the lift.
TEST 7 ---------------------------------------------------------------
"Warning devices are required on all mobile equipment. However,
alarms and flashing hazard lights have been found to agitate the High
Energy Pellet and have therefore been disabled for your safety."
1. Shoot the blue portal onto the wall opposite the emitter. (Note
the burn mark on the wall where the energy pellet is hitting it.)
"Good. Now use the Aperture Science un-stationary scaffold to reach
the chamber lock."
2. When the moving platform is at the maximum left side, shoot the
blue portal onto the ceiling above it, then drop through the yellow
portal onto it (you can look through the portal to get your timing
right). Ride the portal to the exit gate and get in the lift.
TEST 8 ---------------------------------------------------------------
"Please note that we have added a consequence for failure. Any
contact with the chamber floor will result in an unsatisfactory mark
on your official testing record, followed by death. Good luck."
1. Wait for the yellow portal to open. Shoot the blue portal onto
the wall opposite the emitter (where the burn mark is).
2. Wait for the Pellet to pass through the portal. Once it is
moving from side to side in front of you, shoot the blue portal onto
the wall opposite the reciever (where the light is).
(If the pellet explodes halfway through, try again but be faster! :)
3. Shoot the blue portal onto the wall at the end of the platform
where you are, and step through it onto the inner platform.
4. Shoot the blue portal onto the wall behind where the moving
platform stops, and step through the yellow platform onto it. Ride
the moving platform to the end and get in the lift.
"Very impressive. Please note that any appearance of danger is
merely a device to enhance your testing experience."
TEST 9 ---------------------------------------------------------------
"The Enrichment Centre regrets to inform you that this next test is
impossible. Make no attempt to solve it. The Enrichment Centre
apologises for this clearly broken test chamber. Once again, the
Enrichment Centre offers its most sincere apology on the occasion of
this unsolvable test environment. Frankly, this chamber was a
mistake. If we were you we would quit now."
1. Yea, right! Shoot the blue portal onto the floor underneath the
cube. Let the cube fall through and then pass through yourself.
2. Shoot the blue portal through the hole in the wall above the force
field to the distant side of the walled-off chamber, then pick up
the cube and walk through the yellow portal.
3. Drop the cube on the button and get in the lift.
"Fantastic. You remained resolute and resourceful in an atmosphere of
extreme pessimism."
TEST 10 --------------------------------------------------------------
"Hello again. To reiterate *static* previous request *static* of
momentum."
1. Wait for the yellow portal to appear on the wall above and behind
you, then shoot the floor with the blue portal and jump (don't just
fall) in. Climb the stairs and enter the next room.
2. Wait for the yellow portal to appear on the wall above and behind
you, then shoot the floor at the bottom of the pit with the blue
portal, jump, and fall all the way in. Once over the pit, enter the
next room.
"Spectacular. You appear to understand how a portal affects forward
momentum, or to be more precise, how it does not."
3. Shoot the blue portal onto the wall above and behind you, then
jump and fall into the yellow portal. You should land on the
platform with a marker tile with 2 circles on it.
"Momentum, a function of mass and velocity, is conserved between
portals. In layman's terms, speedy thing goes in, speedy thing
comes out."
4. Wait for the wall above where you previously were to move forward,
then shoot the blue portal onto it and jump and fall again into the
yellow portal. Get in the lift.
TEST 11 --------------------------------------------------------------
"The Enrichment Centre promises to always a safe testing environment.
In dangerous testing environments, the Enrichment Centre promises to
always provide useful advice. For instance: 'The floor here will
kill you. Try to avoid it.'"
* Security Camera on the wall behind you as you come in. "Vital
testing apparatus destroyed." (This is repeated for every camera from
now on.)
1. Shoot the blue portal onto any wall. Wait for the portal to
change to a platform where it's safe to walk, then pass through and
press the red button. It opens a door on the opposite wall; quickly
shoot the blue portal through it onto the far wall of the chamber
within.
2. Wait for the yellow portal to reappear behind you and pass through
it.
3. Look through the large window. When the yellow portal is about to
be opposite the reciever, shoot the blue portal opposite the emitter
in this room (look for the burn mark). Remember to allow time for the
pellet to get to the portal - shoot as early as you can.
4. Shoot the blue portal onto any wall. Wait for the portal to
change to the moving platform, then walk through and get on it. Ride
the moving platform to the centre of the room and get the upgraded
portal gun.
"The Device has been modified so that it can now manufacture two
linked portals at once. As part of an optional test protocol, we are
pleased to present an amusing fact: the device is now more valuable
than the organs, and combined incomes, of everyone in subject hometown
here."
5. Press the red button that appears when you get the upgraded portal
gun, and shoot the blue portal through it at the far wall. Get back
on the moving platform and ride it to the yellow portal, then pass
through. Get in the lift.
TEST 12 --------------------------------------------------------------
"*static* fling yourself. *static* fling into spa- *static*."
1. Shoot a blue portal at the wall opposite you over the pit, and a
yellow portal into the bottom of the pit. Jump and fall through
the yellow portal and use momentum to reach the platform above your
original location, with a two-dot marker.
2. Shoot the blue portal onto the wall further above and further
forward of the previous one, then repeat the jump and fall to land
on the platform with a three-dot marker.
3. Shoot the blue portal onto the wall behind the red button, that
is angled at 45 degrees, and repeat the jump and fall through the
yellow platform to land on the platform with a cube.
4. Get the cube, jump down (no need to portal) and put the cube on
the button.
5. Repeat the jump and fall to get back to the platform with the
cube. Go through the exit gate and get in the lift.
"Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee *static*"
TEST 13 --------------------------------------------------------------
"Now that you are in control of both portals, this next test could
take a very, very, long time. If you become light-headed from thirst,
feel free to pass out. An intubation associate will be dispatched to
revive you with peptic salve and adrenaline."
* Security camera on the wall behind you as you enter.
1. Shoot the yellow portal onto the wall on the upper floor, behind
the cube. Shoot the blue portal onto any wall near you. Pass
through, get the cube, fall down with it and put it on the button,
then pass through again and go through the opened gate.
* Security camera on the wall behind you as you enter the larger half
of the chamber.
2. Shoot the blue portal onto the wall in front of the emitter and
the yellow portal onto the ceiling in line with the reciever. Wait
for a pellet to hit the reciever.
3. Shoot the blue portal onto the ceiling above the moving platform
and the yellow platform onto any wall you can reach. Look through
the portal to get your timing right to pass through and land on the
platform. Get the cube and fall back to the floor.
4. Shoot the blue portal onto the ceiling above the left-hand button
(the one with a one-dot marker above it). Look through the yellow
portal to check your positioning. Once done, "post" the cube through
the yellow portal (you can go through too if you like, but you don't
have to)
5. Shoot the blue portal through the high-up gate you came through
from the first chamber. Enter the yellow portal to go back to the
first chamber. Shoot the blue portal onto any wall you can reach,
then take the cube off the button and pass through the portal.
6. Shoot the blue portal onto the ceiling above the other button (the
one with a two-dot marker above it). "Post" the cube through the
yellow portal. The gate should open.
7. Shoot the blue portal onto the wall above the gate. Go through
the yellow portal, go through the gate and get in the lift.
"As part of a previously mentioned required test protocol, we can no
longer lie to you. When the testing is over, you will be.. missed."
TEST 14 --------------------------------------------------------------
"All subjects intending to handle high energy gamma leaking portal
technology must be informed that they may be informed of applicable
regulatory compliance issues. No further compliance information is
required or will be provided, and you are an excellent test subject."
1. As you enter the area, turn left and walk towards the pit. A
set of stairs will appear. Climb it.
2. Shoot the blue portal onto the wall opposite where the cube is.
Wait for the staircase to disappear, then shoot the yellow portal
onto the floor where it used to be, and jump from the upper platform
into the yellow portal to fling yourself to the cube.
3. Get the cube and put it on the button. Turn back and shoot the
yellow portal onto the ceiling above the reciever on the upper
level.
4. Pass through the gate that the button opened and jump across the
moving platforms (old school!) Once you get to the other side, shoot
the blue portal onto the wall opposite the emitter and wait for the
pellet to hit the reciever.
"Very, very, good. A complementary victory lift has been activated
in the main chamber."
5. Pass through the blue portal yourself (hey, why not!) to land on
the reciever (it does you no harm to land on an active reciever) then
walk to the elevator platform in the main room and get in the lift.
TEST 15 --------------------------------------------------------------
"The Enrichment Center is committed to the well-being of all
participants. Cake, and grief counselling will be available at the
conclusion of the test. Thank you for helping us help you help us
all."
* Security camera on the wall behind you as you enter.
1. Shoot the blue portal onto the extruded wall above and behind you
as you enter. Shoot the yellow portal onto the floor and jump into
it. As you fall, shoot the yellow portal onto the floor again at
the point where you are about to land. Keep doing this until you are
flung through the force field. Move into the next room.
* Security camera on the wall behind you as you enter.
2. Shoot the blue portal onto the wall opposite the emitter and the
yellow portal onto the wall anywhere opposite the chamber with the
reciever in it. Wait for the pellet to pass through the portal,
and then quickly pass through the force field before the pellet
passes back through the portal. (Passing through a force field
destroys all your portals.)
3. Quickly place the blue portal on the wall where the pellet hit
(look for the burn mark) and the yellow portal on the ceiling above
the reciever. Wait for the pellet to hit the reciever. Get on
the elevator platform and move to the next room.
4. Shoot the blue portal onto the extruded wall above and behind you
as you enter. Facing in the direction that you entered, turn left and
pass through an arch into a small sub-chamber.
* Security camera on the left hand side of the sub-chamber.
5. Shoot the yellow portal onto the bottom of the pit in the sub-
chamber. Jump and fall through and, just as in step 1, shoot the
yellow portal onto the floor again when you are just about to land.
Keep trying steps 4-5 until you are flung through the force field.
6. In the new area repeat the same process as in step 1 to get
through the force field. Take care not to drift to the side or you
may hit the energy pellet.
7. Shoot the blue portal onto the wall that the energy pellet is
hitting AFTER it's bounced off the 45 degree angled wall. Shoot the
yellow portal onto the flat wall opposite on the other side of the
angled wall. Wait for the pellet to hit the reciever.
8. Repeat the step 1 process *AGAIN* to get back through the force
field.
9. Pass through the arch in this area and use portals to cross the
backwards moving platforms over the killer floor. Use the following
procedure: shoot the blue portal onto the wall facing you at the first
corner of the passage. Then shoot the yellow portal onto the outside
wall, wait for there to be a platform behind the portal and step
through. Quickly turn and shoot the blue portal at the facing wall of
the second corner of the passage and ride the platform back to the
outside. Again wait for there to be a platform behind the yellow
portal and pass through. Now you should be able to see the room at
the other end, shoot the blue portal into the room, but do not shoot
directly forward as a metal portal-proof pillar there blocks you -
shoot to the side of the pillar. Then shoot the yellow portal onto
any wall in the passage and pass through it.
* Security camera, probably opposite you.
10. Ride the elevator platform in the far right corner of the room
up into the chamber there. Shoot the blue portal onto one of the
walls of the chamber. Look across the room at the high-up chamber
in the opposite corner and shoot the yellow portal there.
11. Very quickly press the red button in the chamber you're in,
rush through the blue portal, press the red button in the chamber
you arrive in, then from the window of the chamber shoot the blue
portal in front of the emitter and the orange portal in front of
the reciever. Wait for the pellet to hit the reciever. Get on
the elevator platform and get in the lift. Phew!
"Did you know, you can donate one or all of your vital organs to the
Aperture Science Self-Esteem Fund for Girls? It's true."
TEST 16 --------------------------------------------------------------
"Due to mandatory scheduled maintenance, the appropriate chamber for
this testing sequence is currently unavailable. It has been replaced
with a live fire course designed for military androids. The
Enrichment Centre apologises for the inconvenience and wishes you the
best of luck."
* Security camera right in front of you as you round the corner.
1. Push over the turret facing to the left in the first area.
* Security camera right in front of you as you round the corridor
corner.
2. Facing the left-hand arch, quickly enter the beam and shoot the
blue portal onto the wall behind the turret. Move quickly out of
the archway before the turret fires. Shoot the yellow portal onto
any wall, pass through and push the turret over.
3. Repeat the same procedure with the turret in the alcove on the
left hand side of the corridor. This turret is quicker to fire so it
may get you once or twice, but you can still shoot a portal behind
it, then use the opposite portal on any wall to get behind it and
push it over.
* Security camera above the turret in the alcove.
4. Hide behind the glass to prevent the next turret shooting you, and
move until it shuts down. Then quickly step in front of the glass and
shoot the blue portal onto the ceiling above the turret (note the
"X"). Again the turret may tag you, don't worry. Shoot the yellow
portal onto the floor. Pick up one of the cubes and drop it through
the yellow portal to smack the turret on the head. DO NOT GO THROUGH
THE PORTAL YOURSELF or the second turret, opposite, will shred you.
5. Hug the wall very closely to shoot the blue portal onto the
ceiling above the second turret (notice another red X). Drop the
second cube through the yellow portal and brain the turret.
* Having moved the two cubes, you can move into the "secret" area
they were obstructing to see interesting things. Were those cubes
even supposed to be here, and part of the test?
6. Once you are sure the turret's dead, pass through the yellow portal
yourself, and land behind the cube, further into the corner. Crouch
and push the cube forward, hiding behind it to avoid the next turret's
fire. Shoot the blue portal behind the turrets, then hide behind the
cube and make a quick sprint across the opening back to an area with
a portal-able floor. Shoot the yellow portal onto the floor, and fall
down. Push over the two turrets.
7. Carefully move across to the side nearest you of the furthest door,
and shoot the yellow portal onto the X on the ceiling above the
corner turret, then hide behind the frame before it shoots you.
Quickly run across the door, then shoot a blue portal UNDERNEATH the
nearest turret to the door. Enjoy the hilarious dialog as the turrets
kill each other ("Aaaaargh! It's me! My fault!") and rack up your
Friendly Fire achievement.
(Also, in this room, if you move carefully before killing any of the
turrets, you can make the turret in the far right corner shoot the
turret near the entrance, which makes it shriek "Don't shoot!" :) )
8. Just for a laugh, let's do it again. Enter the room and move to
the right, using the corner to hide from the turret in the far right
corner. Shoot the yellow portal onto the X above it. Now, go to
the room next door and get a cube to drop on the button and open the
exit gate (drop the cube quickly to avoid getting shot). You'll see
the tell-tale line that says there's another turret beyond the gate.
Again use the room's internal corner to hide from the turret as you
move up to the exit gate and shoot the blue portal through the
gauze wall underneath the turret in the next room. Whack!
* Security camera above where the third turret was.
9. Shoot the yellow portal at any safe wall and pass through.
* Security camera on the wall of the chamber where the turret was.
10. Shoot the yellow portal at the wall by the side of the turret in
the next chamber. Move to the side of the grille to see the side
wall. Shoot the blue portal at any safe wall, pass through, push the
turret over and get in the lift.
"Well done, android. The Enrichment Centre once again reminds you
that android hell is a real place where you will be sent at the first
sign of defiance."
TEST 17 --------------------------------------------------------------
"The Vital Apparatus Stand will deliver a Weighted Companion Cube in
3.. 2.. 1.."
1. Pick up the cube.
"This Weighted Companion Cube will accompany you through the test
chamber. Please take care of it."
2. Use the cube to climb the stairs in the next room. Drop it on the
floor, jump on it, jump up onto a stair, then look down from the stair
and pick the cube up. Repeat this to climb two stairs.
3. Pick up the cube and hold it in front of you as you move down the
tight corridor. It should deflect any energy pellets fired at you by
the emitter at the end, although you can crouch behind it to be sure.
For future reference, this corridor is corridor A.
"The symptoms most commonly produced by Enrichment Centre testing are
superstition, percieving inanimate objects as alive, and
hallucinations. The Enrichment Centre reminds you that the Weighted
Companion Cube will never threaten to stab you and, in fact, cannot
speak."
4. Keep holding the cube towards the emitters as you enter the next
room. Wait for the right hand emitter in front of you to actually
emit a pellet, and then quickly run backwards up the staircase
opposite it to block the pellet with your Cube. Walk backwards down
the corridor, holding the cube in front of you. (Don't just enter the
corridor without waiting for a pellet to be emitted first, because
there may already be a pellet in the corridor that will hit you in the
back. If you go down holding the cube forwards, the active pellet may
expire while you are in the corridor and you will be shot in the back
by the emitter.) This corridor is corridor B.
* Security camera on the wall behind you at the end of this corridor.
5. Fall down from the high platform in the next room. There is a
pushed-out wall just behind you as you fall. Use portals to enter
it to find a rather disturbing secret area.
6. Leave the secret area and enter the archway on your left, holding
the Cube. Use the cube to deflect the Pellet into the reciever.
* Security camera above the archway.
7. Use portals to return to the upper ledge where you entered the
room, and shoot the blue portal onto the wall tilted 45 degrees,
opposite the reciever. Shoot the yellow portal onto the wall at the
end of corridor B, to capture the pellet that was trying to kill you
earlier. Wait for the pellet to hit the reciever.
"The Enrichment Centre reminds you that the Weighted Companion Cube
cannot speak. In the event that the Weighted Companion Cube DOES
speak, the Enrichment Centre urges you to disregard its advice."
8. Walk back to corridor A, and shoot the blue portal onto the very
end of the corridor (you can do this without entering the corridor),
again to capture the pellet. Shoot the yellow portal somewhere
harmless to keep the pellet out of the way.
9. Return to the main area and shoot the yellow portal onto the
pushed out wall (where the secret area was). Get the Cube. Carefully
enter the archway opposite the portal (watch out for the pellet).
Walk to the raised button at the back of the wall and put the cube on
it, then CAREFULLY stand yourself on the button at the front of the
room (there is JUST enough space for you to stand on the button
without the pellet hitting you as it passes). Let the pellet hit the
reciever.
10. Use portals to return to the platform where you came in, making
sure to take the cube with you. Jump across the three newly-raised
platforms, turn right, and jump into the new section. Drop the
Cube on the button.
"You did it. The Weighted Companion Cube certainly brought you good
luck. However, it cannot accompany you for the rest of the test and,
unfortunately, must be euthanised. Please escort your Companion Cube
to the Aperture Science Emergency Intelligence Incinerator."
11. Enter the next area, pass through the open gate and press the
button to open the incinerator.
"Rest assured that an independant panel of ethicists has absolved the
Enrichment Centre, Aperture Science employees, and all test subjects
of any moral responsibility for the Companion Cube euthanising
process."
(The following five quotes are repeated until the cube is destroyed)
"While it has been a faithful companion, your Companion Cube cannot
accompany you through the rest of the test. If it could talk (and
the Enrichment Centre takes this opportunity to remind you that it
cannot), it would tell you to go on without it because it would rather
die in fire than become a burden to you."
"Testing cannot continue until your Companion Cube has been
incinerated."
"Although the euthanising process is remarkably painful, eight out of
ten Aperture Science engineers believe that the Companion Cube is
most likely incapable of feeling much pain."
"The Companion Cube cannot continue through the testing. State and
Local Statutory regulations prohibit it from simply remaining here,
alone and companionless. You must euthanise it."
"Destroy your Companion Cube or the testing cannot continue."
12. Sorry... go get the Cube off the button and drop it into the
incinerator. Get in the lift. (Not in cruelty, nor in wrath, the
reaper came today; an angel visited this gray path, and took the cube
away...) At least, you get your Fratricide achievement for this.
"You euthanised your faithful Companion Cube more quickly than any
test subject on record. Congratulations."
TEST 18 --------------------------------------------------------------
"The experiment is nearing its conclusion. The Enrichment Centre is
required to remind you that you will be baked, and then there will be
cake."
1. Place the blue portal on the ceiling opposite the pit and the
yellow portal on any safe wall, and pass through it.
2. Crouch under the left-hand wall to look around another secret
area.
3. Leaving the secret area, place a blue portal on the highest and
most distant ceiling and the yellow portal on the wall on the opposite
side of the pit, slightly below you. Jump across the pit and into the
yellow portal.
4. Shoot the blue portal on the ceiling above the three-dot platform
and the yellow portal onto the floor, then fall through.
5. Repeat the same process to reach the four-dot platform, except
this time shoot the blue portal onto the wall above it.
6. Use the "fling" technique to reach the opposite platform. Shoot
the blue portal onto the pushed-out wall above you, the yellow portal
onto the platform below you as you look over the edge of the platform
you're on, then jump and fall into the yellow portal.
7. Press the red button in this chamber and pass through the opened
wall.
8. Destroy the four turrets in this room by using the portals to
redirect the energy pellets to hit them. The pellet emitter in the
centre of the room rotates between four directions firing a pellet
each time. It can be difficult to line up the portals with the
turrets, so you'll just have to use trial and error, I'm afraid.
9. Shoot the blue portal onto one of the burn marks where the
launched pellets are hitting the wall, and the yellow portal onto the
extruded wall at the far end of the chamber. Wait for a pellet to
pass through the blue portal and then VERY QUICKLY shoot the blue
portal onto the 90-degree rotated wall on the left hand side, then
shoot the yellow portal onto a safe wall, and jump through the yellow
portal to hit the raised button. The aim here is to press the button
(thus opening the door to the reciever) just before the pellet arrives
at the reciever, because the door does not stay open very long.
10. Get on the moving platform and ride across to the other side of
the room. The jump to the platform with the cube on it is impossible
from here, so just jump and fall into the lower area. Shoot the blue
portal onto any safe wall on the side where you started EXCEPT the
moving wall section you came in by (look for the blue connecting line)
and the yellow portal onto any safe wall in the current chamber.
Press the button to make the wall you came in by re-open, then quickly
head through the yellow portal to the other side. Once the opening
wall turns 45 degrees, place the blue portal on it, then head to the
right hand side of the platform you're on and place the yellow portal
on the safe floor below, then jump into the yellow portal to "fling"
yourself from the 45 degree angled wall and into the cube chamber.
11. Get the cube. Wait for the moving platform, jump onto it, and
leave the cube on it. Fall back down into the lower chamber, shoot
the blue portal over to the other side of the room again (again, not
on the section you came in by) and place the yellow portal in the
lower chamber. Pass through the yellow portal and collect the cube
off the platform, placing it securely on the platform you're on.
Pass back through the blue portal, press the button to open the wall,
then return through the yellow portal, get the cube, and carry it
back through the open wall. Drop it on the button.
12. Use portals to get back to the platform with the exit gate. Shoot
the blue portal onto the wall above the exit gate, fall down onto the
platform in front of and below you then shoot the yellow portal onto
the floor and pass through. (Don't fall all the way down through the
yellow portal, as you DON'T want a fling this time!)
13. Pass through the exit gate and down the corridor. No, it's not
the end.
* But you do get to blow up a security camera (right wall). So that's
nice.
14. Ok, this bit is hard, but fun. Shoot the blue portal onto the
only platform that you can see above the killer floor. To the left of
where you came in is a deep pit; shoot the yellow portal there and
then jump down into it. You should bounce up through the blue portal,
into the air. As you bounce up you will be able to see the surface of
the next highest platform; shoot the yellow portal onto it. You will
fall back down into the blue portal and be launched out of the yellow
portal on the higher platform, from where you should be able to see
the surface of the next platform in the sequence; shoot the blue
portal onto it, then fall back down into the yellow portal, and keep
climbing this way, alternating portals. If you miss one, just allow
yourself to fall back into the portal you came from, bounce up and
down again, and then give it another try - but DO NOT TOUCH THE
DIRECTION KEYS; if you miss falling into a portal, you're stuck.
There are several platforms followed by a 45 degree angled fling
platform to climb up in this way. If it becomes difficult to keep
track of what's going on while the screen is spinning wildly, bear in
mind that the screen spinning does not affect the actual of your
mouse. In other words, line up your crosshairs as far as you can,
then when the screen starts to spin take your hand off the mouse, wait
to fall and bounce back through the portal, and your crosshairs will
be back in the same position they were before and you can carry on
lining up.
15. Get in the lift.
"Well done. Be advised that the next test requires exposure to
uninsulated electrical parts that may be dangerous under certain
conditions. For more information, please attend an Enrichment Centre
Electrical Safety seminar."
TEST 19 --------------------------------------------------------------
"Welcome to the final test. When you are done, you will drop the
Device in the Equipment Recovery Annex. Enrichment Centre regulations
require both hands to be empty before any cake *static* ake.."
* Security camera on your right as you round the corner.
1. Shoot a yellow portal onto the 45-degree angled wall below the
emitter, and a blue portal onto the 45-degree angled wall below the
reciever. Let a pellet pass through. Once it passes through the
portal, shoot the blue portal somewhere else (out of the way of the
pellet) so that when the pellet bounces back off the portal-proof
wall, it hits the 45-degree angle in the normal way and is
reflected into the reciever.
2. Notice that, at the corner of the moving platform's "track" there
is a platform and a portalable wall. Shoot the blue portal onto
the wall behind that platform, then the yellow platform onto any
safe wall, and pass through it. Looking beyond the corner along the
track there is a door in the way, but you can shoot the wall of an
alcove on the left; shoot the yellow portal there and pass through
the blue portal.
* Security camera above the switch in the alcove.
3. Hit the switch in the alcove and quickly shoot the blue portal
onto the side wall beyond the door. Look through the yellow portal
and wait for the platform to arrive, then jump on the platform
through the portal.
4. Shoot the yellow portal onto the wall where the trapped pellet is
bouncing back and forth, and after it passes through, shoot the
yellow portal somewhere else (behind/above you) to get the pellet out
of the way.
* Security camera on the corner of the platform's track.
5. Shoot the blue portal onto the side wall beyond the blocking wall
on the platform track, then shoot the yellow portal onto the blocking
wall. Very carefully jump through the yellow portal so that you are
standing "in" the blocking wall, then wait for the platform and jump
onto it. You will now see the cake symbol on the wall, and the
platform will round the final corner.. straight into an incinerator.
"Congratulations. The test is now over. All aperture technologies
remain safely operational up to 4000 degrees Kelvin. Rest assured
that there is absolutely no chance of a dangerous equipment
malfunction prior to your victory candescence. Thank you for
participating in this Aperture Science Computer Aided Activity.
Goodbye."
THE CAKE -------------------------------------------------------------
1. Well, of course, you're not jumping in the stupid fire. Shoot
the blue portal above the platform over the fire, then the yellow
portal on the side wall, and jump through.
"What are you doing? Stop it! I-i-i-i-i-i-i-ii...eee are pleased
that you made it through the final challenge where we pretended we
were going to murder you. We are very, very happy for your success.
We are throwing a party in honour of your tremendous success. Place
the device on the ground, then lie on your stomach with your arms at
your sides. A Party Associate will arrive shortly to collect you for
your party. Make no further attempt to leave the testing area.
Assume the Party Escort Submission position or you will miss the
party."
2. On the higher platform, look back at the way you just came and
you'll see an entrance at the top. You need to fling yourself there.
Place the blue portal on the very top of the back wall of the platform
you're on, then place the yellow portal on the floor, fall through it,
and as you fall shoot the yellow portal where you are about to land.
This should fling you into the upper chamber.
3. Walking down the corridor here will unlock the Partygoer
achievement.
4. Try to climb the stairs in the room, but they'll fall to bits, so
use portals to reach the upper floor. The door here is slightly ajar;
"use" the door to open it. Climb the stairs in the chamber beyond and
you'll come up to a locked door in a link-fence wall. Um, let's just
suffice it to say that there is a portal-able wall in the space beyond
the fence, and you can shoot through the fence.
"Hello. Where are you? I know you're there. I can feel you here.
Hello."
5. In the next chamber, use portals to safely pass through the left-
hand fan (the fan blades block your portal shots but you can time a
shot through them), then again use a portal to move to the far side of
the large chamber that's visible from beyond the fan.
6. Face the way you came and shoot the blue portal high on the
opposite wall of the chamber. Shoot the yellow portal onto a safe
wall and you should be able to jump/fall through and land on the
gurney on the other side of the room.
7. Go in the door, just for fun, and look around at the offices and
things there. This is where you'll first see the name of the computer
running the tests (GLaDOS: Generic Lifeform and Disk Operating
Systems) and that it was designed as a competitor to Black Mesa.
You'll be able to enter several of the observation offices that you've
seen near the tests so far.. except that now you'll see they're..
empty. And filled with rubble and discord.
[Note: The "Disk Operating System" is a very old computer joke. The
text-only predecessor to Windows, which was used on PCs in the 80's,
was called "MSDOS" (MicroSoft Disc Operating System), but there were a
number of other competing systems which all had "DOS" in their names
(DRDOS, PCDOS, ProDOS, etc.) so GLaDOS is just continuing the trend.
:) ]
8. Once you've finished enjoying the plot, move over to the other end
of the gurney. Notice the marks on the wall telling you to go up, so
shoot the blue portal on the wall behind the partly collapsed platform
at the top left of the chamber as you enter, then shoot a yellow
platform on the safe floor and step through. From there, you'll see
another platform above the area where you came in. Shoot a blue
portal onto the portal-able wall opposite that platform, and then use
the yellow portal still on the floor to fling yourself through the
blue portal.
"What are you doing? You haven't escaped, you know. You're not even
going the right way. Hello? Is anyone there?"
9. Climb the stairs in this area, and then jump into the broken cube
transport tube. After a short journey, you'll fall into a equipment
dispensor tube, where your weight breaks it and drops you back into
the area for the "impossible" test 9.
"Okay. The testing is over now. You win. Go back to the Recovery
Annex for your cake. It was a fun test, and we're all impressed at
how you won. The test is over. Come back."
10. Stand on the button to open the exit gate, and shoot the blue
portal through it. Shoot the yellow portal onto any safe wall and
pass through, then walk to the end and fall down the open lift shaft.
"Uh-oh. Somebody cut the cake. I told them to wait for you but they
cut it anyway. There is still some left, so if you hurry back.."
11. Shoot the blue portal onto the ceiling above the storage boxes
and the yellow one on the bottom of the lift shaft, and pass through,
crouching. Climb onto the rising/falling pistons and, when the higher
one is in the raised position, shoot the yellow portal onto the top of
the platform that's back the way you came. Fall off the piston and
follow the chamber around to get to the storage boxes from the other
side. Crouch again, get under your previous portal, and then uncrouch
under it to stick your head through the portals! Jump out, then run
along the top of the crushing piston to the painted sign on the wall.
12. Shoot the blue portal through the gauze at the end of the
passage, then come back the way you came, walk across the top of the
piston again to get back to the top of the platform above the storage
boxes, and shoot the yellow platform onto the floor and pass through
it. Use a very small "fling" to get yourself to the ongoing passage -
shoot the blue portal onto the wall behind and above you, the yellow
portal onto the wall in front of you, then jump through.
(Map break)
"You're not even going the right way. Where do you think you're
going? Because I don't think you're going where you think you're
going. Hello?"
13. Take the right branching corridor and climb the stairs. (There's
a secret area you can reach by going underneath the staircase and
then using portals to pass through a chainlink fence, then crouching
through a passage, but there isn't really anything interesting there.)
While overviewing the piston room, shoot a portal right across the
room onto the upper of the two floors visible across the room, then
shoot the opposite portal onto any safe wall and pass through. From
here, if you move to the correct angle you can juuuuuuuust see a
portalable wall at the back of the highest passage out of the room
(on your left as you face the pistons). It's there! Trust me on
this! Shoot a portal there, and then pass through to it. Pass along
the corridor.
"Didn't we have some fun, though? Remember when the platform was
sliding into the fire pit, and I said 'Goodbye', and you were like,
'No Way', and then I was like, 'We pretended we were going to murder
you'. That was great. Is anyone there?"
14. Shoot the blue portal onto the ceiling of the area above you,
then the yellow portal onto the ceiling above one of the pistons.
Then stand on the piston and let it push you through the portal. Jump
across the two horizontal pistons onto the platform. Use the platform
you are on, and the portal-able wall far above you, to perform a fling
to access the area opposite that portal-able wall. You know how to do
a fling by now, right?
15. Don't try and go through the fast moving pistons. Shoot a portal
behind them, then the opposite portal onto any safe wall and pass
through it.
"You really shouldn't be here. This isn't safe for you. It is not
too late for you to turn back. I am not angry. Just go back to the
testing area."
16. Again, don't bother with the two moving pistons. Look carefully
through the chamber they're in and you should be able to shoot a
portal through onto the wall behind them, then walk through your
existing portal to get there.
17. More pistons to not bother with. Shoot the blue portal above the
piston that the "over here" arrow points to and the yellow portal onto
any safe wall. Pass through. Then, shoot the blue portal onto the
wall at the very top of the chamber, between the two pistons. Pass
back through the yellow portal, and carefully position yourself to be
"inside the wall". You should be able to see the portal-able floor of
the top of the chamber and shoot the yellow portal there. (If you
can't fire, just move forward a tiny bit more.) Then shoot the blue
portal onto any safe wall and pass through.
18. Walk through the chamber and fall down on the right hand side of
the T junction in the cube delivery pipe. Crouch and walk along the
pipe, then fall down onto the lower pipe that crosses it.
"You should have turned left before. It's funny, actually, when you
think about it. Someday we'll remember this and laugh, and laugh, and
laugh. Oh boy. Well, you may as well come on back."
19. Follow around the corner. When you reach the piston, turn to the
left and shoot the blue portal above the point where the piston hits.
Walk back along the pipe and shoot the yellow portal onto a wall, then
wait for the piston to be fully extended, and carefully jump across
the killer floor through the portal. (You can make this jump but it's
tricky - make sure to get as close as you can to the edge of the pipe
you're on.) Walk along the piston and onto the upper platform.
Follow the platform along and then jump down the hole.
(Map Break)
20. Check out the "secret" storage area through the crouch tunnel,
then walk across into the next section. The pipes under you will open
and drop you into a trap - don't worry, this is meant to happen.
Three doors around the trap will open, each one revealing a turret
behind. As each door opens, quickly shoot the blue portal onto the
side wall of the chamber inside, then the yellow portal onto any safe
wall, then pass through and push the turret over. Do this quickly to
each of the three turrets as it arrives.
21. I have no idea if this is how you're supposed to solve this
puzzle, but what the heck. Get one of the oil drums from the central
chamber, drop it in the chamber with the grabbing arm, then stand on
it. You should now be able to see a portal-able wall in the room off
to the right. Shoot a portal on it, then put the opposite portal on
any wall and pass through.
"You're not a good person. You know that, right? Good people don't
get up here. Can you hear me?"
22. Portal through the chain-link fence and push the blinking turret
over. It can be tricky to find a portal-able spot here; I went
through on top of the table with the radio! :) Move the turret until
its blinking beam isn't shining at the opposite corner of the area any
more, then move over there and look up and towards the way you came in
for a portal-able ceiling on the upper level above the cube transport
tube. Portal through and walk around the walkway through the door.
Crouch through the passageway, fall into the area with the turret and
push it over.
23. Enter the new area. There is another secret storage area on the
far wall of this area on the right. And how to get out? Well, that
nifty moving wall that let you in is portal-able on both sides, and it
stopped at a 45 degree angle. You guessed it - it's flingin' time!
Fling yourself onto the collapsed walkway and walk around the
corridor.
"This is your fault. It didn't have to be like this. I'm not kidding
now. Turn back or I will kill you. I'm going to kill you, and all
the cake is gone. You don't even care, do you? This is your last
chance."
24. You can enter an office on the right here, but only for fun. Move
on, through the force field, and open the door. There's a nasty robot
here that shoots rockets. Fortunately, it's really slow and easy to
dodge (but unfortunately one rocket kills you, so be careful). You
can have fun making it shoot itself if you want, but all you need to
do is make it shoot once (to break the glass on the room you're in),
then run across to the otherside of the chamber it's in, make it shoot
at you again and dodge (to break the glass on the next room) then
jump through the glass and run out the door. While you're here,
though, shoot a yellow portal onto one of the walls in its chamber.
25. Walk down the corridor and through the hall, then through the
door. Hum, we need to break through another pane of glass. Hey, I
know what to do! Shoot the blue portal on the wall opposite the
glass. Hello again, Mr Rocket Turret! Would you be so kind as to
shoot me again, so that I can dodge and your rocket will hit this
glass? Much obliged! Once that's done, shoot the blue portal
somewhere harmless (on the other side of the door you just came
through is a good bet) and follow the arrow.
26. Oops, a crouch tunnel that's too high to get in. Again, I have
no idea if there's some better way of doing this with portals, but
I just went and got a chair from the office with the rocket turret it
and stood on it. Shoot a portal through the fan at the end onto the
wall, then crawl back through the tunnel and shoot the opposite
portal onto safe wall and pass through.
27. Shoot a portal onto the wall above the red metal platform against
the wall over the killer floor, then shoot the opposite portal onto
any safe wall and pass through, and walk along the red platform.
(Map break)
28. Walk along the red platform until you can see the safe floor at
the end of the passage. Shoot a portal onto it, then the opposite
portal onto the wall your platform is up against, and pass through.
29. Shoot a portal through the tiny little grating at the end of this
platform, then shoot the opposite portal onto any safe wall and pass
through.
30. Walk around on the mucky floor (it makes you skid, but there's
no puzzle or anything with it! Weird) until you can see a portal-able
wall above you, and portal onto it. Be ready for a shock!
31. Well, I warned you! Huge numbers of turrets appear. Don't
panic. Treat this exactly like you did the earlier trap. Portal onto
the side wall of one of the turret chambers and push the turret over.
Then, from inside the chamber, try to find the wall of another turret
chamber, portal to it, and push over that turret too.. and keep going
and climbing that way.
32. Once you've got all the turrets.. well, you saw that two of those
turrets had 45 degree walls protecting them? Could it be flingin'
time? Yes, you've got it. You need to fling from the higher of the
two walls, but you may need to fling from (or, if you're careful, just
stand on) the lower 45 degree wall in order to see it. Use the yellow
portal on the 45 degree wall and the blue portal on the floor. This
is a difficult fling and it may take you a lot of attempts, but it is
possible.
33. As you move down the next corridor, you face two turrets. Hey, I
wonder if the turrets would like to try doing a fling? Hide behind
the pipes to avoid their fire, and shoot blue portals under them.
34. Leave a blue portal underneath the upward shaft that you're at
the bottom of. Move back to the platform and shoot the yellow
platform on the floor of the huge chamber you just came from, and then
jump down into it to be sent flying up the shaft. Where you land, you
should be able to see a portal-able wall above and in front of you;
shoot the yellow portal there, then gently drop through the blue
portal again. (Don't fall through the shaft into the blue portal.)
35. Cross over the big scary bridge and into the offices beyond.
Explore the office a little if you like, then climb the stairs and
cross the big bridge into the silo, and, hey, it's..
GLADOS ---------------------------------------------------------------
"Well, you found me. Congratulations. Was it worth it? Because
despite your violent behaviour, the only thing you've managed to break
so far is my heart. Maybe you could settle for that and we'll just
call it a day. I guess we both know that isn't going to happen. You
chose this path; now I have a surprise for you. Deploying surprise in
5, 4.. *something falls* Time out for a second. That wasn't supposed
to happen. Do you see that thing that fell out of me? What is that?
It's not the surprise. I've never seen it before. Never mind. It's
a mystery I'll solve later, by myself. As you'll be dead. .... I
wouldn't bother with that thing. My guess is that touching it will
just make your life even worse. Somehow. ... It isn't my job to
tell you your business, but if it were me, I'd leave that thing alone.
Do you think I'm trying to trick you with reverse psychology? I mean,
seriously now? Okay, FINE. DO touch it. Pick it up and just stuff
it back into me. Let's be honest. Neither one of us knows what that
thing does. Just put it in the corner and I'll deal with it later.
That thing is probably some kind of raw sewage container. Go ahead
and rub your face all over it. Maybe you should marry that thing,
since you love it so much. Do you want to marry it? Well, I won't
let you. How does that feel?... Have I lied to you? I mean.. in
this room? Trust me. Leave that thing alone. I am being serious now.
That crazy thing is not part of any test protocol. Just ignore that
thing and stand still. Think about it. If that thing is important,
why don't I know about it? I'll tell you what that thing isn't. It
isn't yours. So leave it alone. Are you even listening to me?"
1. No, you don't really have to wait for that whole spiel. That's
what Glados says if you don't do anything. I'm sure you know it's a
trick - but ya gotta do it. Look at the back of the room where
there's an incinerator and place a portal near it. Climb the stairs
on the left of the room, and enter the armored chamber, placing the
opposite portal on the nearest portal-able wall outside first. Press
the button in the chamber to open the furnace, then pick up the
'thing' Glados dropped and throw it in the furnace. (Without the
portals you can't get to the incinerator fast enough.)
"You're kidding me. Did you just stuff that Aperture Science Thing We
Don't Know What It Does into an Aperture Science Emergency
Intelligence Incinerator!? That has got to be the dumbest thing th-
whoa.. whoa.. whoa.... Good news.. I figured out what that thing you
just incinerated did. It was a morality core they installed after I
flooded the Enrichment centre with a deadly neurotoxin, to make me
STOP flooding the Enrichment Centre with a deadly neurotoxin. So get
comfortable while I warm up the neurotoxin emitters.. Oh. That core
may have had some ancillary responsibilities. I can't shut off the
turret defenses. Oh well. If you take my advice you should just lie
down in front of a rocket. It'll be a lot less painful than the
neurotoxin... Alright, just keep doing whatever you think you're
doing. Killing you and giving you good advice aren't mutually
exclusive."
2. Ok, time to kill Glados! You have to hit her three times and each
hit is a two-step process.
a) Put the yellow portal under Glados and the blue portal on a wall.
Get the rocket turret to shoot at you, and redirect the rocket
through the portal to hit Glados. It doesn't matter where you hit
her, as long as you do hit her. The easiest way to do this is to
stand with your back to the turret, look through it at Glados,
look at the turret's search beam (which can usually pass through
you, for some reason) and move carefully until the beam is lined
up, then stop, wait until you hear the turret beep, and get the
heck out of the way before you get a rocket up the bottom.
b) Pick up the bit of Glados that falls off. This is harder than it
sounds, because Glados has a weird picky-uppy ray that she uses to
move the items to awkward locations. See below for how to get to
the locations.
c) Repeat step 1) from this room to stick the core in the
incinerator.
Oh, yea, there's that nasty neurotoxin business. Basically, if you
don't hit Glados three times within about six minutes you're dead.
In an unusually helpful mood, Glados provides a countdown for you.
So, here's how to get the three Cores:
Curiosity Core:
On top of some pipes. Just put a portal on the wall behind them and
reach through.
(Core)
"Who are you? What's that? That thing has numbers on it. Is that a
gun? I smell something burning.."
(Glados, when core is destroyed)
"You think you're doing some damage? 2 plus 2 is... *fizzfizzfizz*
10. ... ... ... In base 4. I'm fine. By the way, I only let you
live this long because I was curious about how you would behave.
Unfortunately, I can't get the neurotoxin into your head any faster."
Knowledge Core:
On top of one of the "fins" at the top of Glados. Put a portal on the
wall high above Glados on that side and jump through - it's a tricky
jump, but possible.
(Core)
"Two cups rhubarb (sliced), two-slash-three cup granulated rhubarb,
one tablespoon all-purpose rhubarb.."
(Glados, when core is destroyed)
"Neurotoxin.. so deadly.. choking.. Hahahaha. When I said deadly it
had major sarcasm quotes around it. I could take a bath in this
stuff. Honestly, it's not deadly at all - to me. You, on the other
hand, will find its deadliness rather less funny."
Anger Core:
Floating in mid-air. This is similar to the previous one, although it
doesn't look it - you have to put a portal high on a nearby wall, then
jump down so you land ON TOP of it.
(Core)
"GRRRRRR! GRRRRRR! GRRRRRRR! GRRRRR!"
(Glados, when core is destroyed - end of game)
"I'm not sure what's going on outside.. all I know is, I'm the only
thing standing between us and the world.. And I... O-o-o-o-o-o-o-o..
*BOOM*"
You are thrown up into the air, and appear in the outside world as
bits of Glados's installation rain down around you.
Then.. deep in the bowels of a complex.. is a cake. Surrounding it,
several lighted spheres, looking eerily like Glados' modules, start to
activate. A robot arm comes down and snuffs out the cake candle.
Hey! You've finished Portal! Enjoy the ending song, and then when
you're back at the menu, wait a few moments for the camera view to
pan... Oh, you get the Heartbreaker achievement too.
A few more choice Glados quotes from the final battle:
"That thing you just broke isn't important to me. It's the Fluid
Catalytic Cracking Unit. It makes shoes for orphans. Nice job
breaking it, hero."
"I'd just like to point out that you were given every opportunity to
succeed. There was even going to be a party for you. A great big
party. All of your friends were invited too. I invited your best
friend the Companion Cube, but of course he couldn't come because you
murdered him. None of your other friends could come because you don't
have any other friends because you are unlikable. It says so here in
your file, 'unlikable', liked by no one, all formal and everything.
It also says you're adopted."
"Speaking of curiousity, I expect you're curious about what happens
after you die. Guess what? I know. But you'll find out first-hand
before I finish explaining it to you. But, in summary, I'd live as
much as you can in the next few minutes."
AND... THAT SONG -----------------------------------------------------
"Final Test Report (Still Alive)"
By "Geek Troubador" Jonathan Coulton
This was a triumph.
I'm making a note here: Huge Success.
It's hard to overstate my satisfaction.
Aperture Science,
We do what we must, because we can.
For the good of all of us
(except the ones who are dead.)
But there's no sense crying over every mistake.
You just keep on trying till you run out of cake.
And the science gets done, and you make a neat gun
For the people who are still alive.
[Personnel File Addendum:
Dear <<Subject Name Here>>,]
I'm not even angry.
I'm being so sincere right now.
Even though you broke my heart and killed me;
And tore me to pieces;
And threw every piece into a fire.
As they burned, it hurt because
I was so happy for you.
Now these points of data make a beautiful line,
And we're out of beta, we're releasing on time.
So I'm GLaD. I got burned. Think of all the things we learned
For the people who are still alive.
[Personnel File Addendum Addendum:
One Last Thing:]
Go ahead and leave me.
I think I prefer to stay inside.
Maybe you'll find someone else to help you.
Maybe Black Mesa.
That was a joke. Ha ha, fat chance.
Anyway, this cake is great;
It's so delicious and moist.
Look at me still talking, when there's science to do.
When I look out there, it makes me glad I'm not you.
I've experiments to run, there is research to be done
On the people who are still alive.
[PS:] And believe me, I am still alive.
[PPS:] I'm doing science and I'm still alive.
[PPPS:] I feel fantastic and I'm still alive.
[FINAL THOUGHT:] While you're dying I'll be still alive.
[FINAL THOUGHT PS:] And when you're dead I will be still alive.
Still alive, still alive, still alive.
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